Police find a “Pasty Bomb” in Hayle.

A Pasty Bomb made by the Pasty Cartel.

A Pasty Bomb made by the Pasty Cartel.

Foundry Square, Hayle was closed off yesterday when a bomb was found inside a pasty.

Leonard Leonardson, a pensioner found the explosive device after buying a medium steak pasty from his favourite shop – Corner to Corner.

He said “I went down Corner to Corner and got a medium steak. As usual, I sat down on a bench opposite the estuary to eat my dinner. When I took the pasty out the bag, I thought, what’s on here then? I could hear the pasty ticking! When I bit into it, my teeth rattled off something hard! I pulled back the pastry and there was a countdown timer and melted wires, it was like something from TV. I thought, whoever planted the bomb wasn’t very smart because when they baked it – all the wires melted!”

Leonard decided to take the pasty back to the shop.

He said…

“I didn’t know what to do, I was so hungry. So I took the bugger back to the shop and told Dicky in the shop I wanted a large steak for compensation, as I almost chipped my tooth! When Dicky behind the counter looked inside the pasty, he shouted “SHIT THE BED!” and ran out the door and hid behind a car! I couldn’t believe it! I had to go behind the counter and get my own bleddy pasty! I don’t know about bomb, but I know one thing – customer service in Hayle has gone down hill lately, it’s nothing like it use to be!”

The bomb brigade was quickly called and the street was blocked off.

Owner of the Corner to Corner Pasty Shop in Foundry Square, Hayle said “Someone must have snuck in here and planted the bomb. It’s terrible, but the pasty trade is a cut throat business. It must have been the Pasty Cartel – they will do anything to take business away from you. I heard a terrible story about what they do with carrots, too terrible to repeat. It won’t stop me though, blow me up I don’t care, it’s like I’ve always said “As long as I got fingers I’ll never stop crimping pasties!”

Dereck Johns of the Bomb Brigade – an amateur bomb disposal club from Camborne said  “Luckily the bomb was melted and posed no danger to the public. We’ve seen this sort of thing before and we recommend that after you buy your pasty, just have a quick listen. If you hear ticking, then give us a call. But whatever you do, don’t throw the pasty anywhere and run, because you can guarantee the seagulls will be fighting over it!”

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